Make Your Day Better

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The HappyU Exercise Get ready to improve your mood quickly. Hold a watch with a second hand and time yourself. You will have ten seconds for each of the seven parts of this exercise. Within seventy seconds you should be feeling better. My mood is my responsibility, and your mood is also up to you. I tend to be negative and depressed sometimes. The HappyU exercise helps me to change my mood from sour to sweet! Read through this exercise once, and then take seventy seconds to try it. Repeat as often as needed.H = Hope for Happiness (repeat words for 10 seconds) Without hope we have nothing. Everyone who has ever struggled has had hope in order to get through life’s difficulties. As you repeat the words “Hope for Happiness” in your mind for ten seconds, remember that there are those whose problems are far worse than yours, and even if your problems are the worst of the worst, you have to have hope in order to find solutions.A = Accept Life (repeat words for 10 seconds) As you repeat the words “Accept Life” for ten seconds, focus on the way life’s experiences take us up and down all the time. Sometimes we are in a cycle that feels wonderful and at other times we do not know how we will make it through the day. A lot can be learned from those who have physical disabilities, and yet with acceptance lead productive and happy lives. In this moment, accept life with all its many colors and situations. Accept, accept, and accept! Take a deep breath now and know how alive you are. Know that as you accept life and its challenges, you will have the energy to help yourself and others.P = Picture of Happiness (visualize image for 10 seconds) Visualize a color, a flower, a person, a beach, a spiritual symbol or any other image that can quickly change your mood. It has been said that a picture is worth a thousand words, and in ten seconds you will prove that to yourself. You are replacing your images of catastrophe with an image that brings happiness.P = Play a Song (hear a song in your mind for 10 seconds) In your mind, play a song or any sound that makes you happy. Listen to the birds, or the sound of a waterfall. Listen to the laughter of a child, the sound of a harp, or play your favorite song in your mind. Music is always a mood lifter.Y = Yearn for Happiness (feel your need for happiness for 10 seconds) Feel within your soul a yearning for the happiness that life offers. Do not demand happiness or beg for happiness. Yearning and aspiring for a quality sends your intentions out into the universe. As you allow yourself to yearn for happiness, you are creating the space within the soul to receive true bliss. With this bliss you will be inspired to make good choices for yourself and for your world.U = Unite with Life (repeat words for 10 seconds) Okay, it is true that life has its ups and downs, backwards and forwards actions, and its depressions and elations. We are human beings with human challenges. Our difficulties are all part of the yin and yang of material life. As you repeat the words “Unite with Life” in your mind for ten seconds, know that you are part of the whole of existence. Each one of us is a spark of the Divine Consciousness. We have access to the psychic inner voice that connects us to the God of our understanding. Remember that the word “psychic” in ancient times meant “soul.” You are born with a cosmic connection to your soul energy. You are born with a cosmic connection to the Divine. As you allow yourself to open up spiritually, you will be able to give more to yourself, your family, your community and your world. What to do with the last 10 seconds? Yes, yes, I realize that my instructions for the HappyU exercise only used up sixty of the seventy seconds. What should you do for the last ten seconds? How should I know? You are your own person and can use this ten seconds as you like. In fact you can make changes in this exercise and customize it to your liking. The important thing is to find a way to change your mood in seventy seconds so that you can have more fun. And believe me, if you are having more fun, the people around you will also. Fun is contagious.A HappyU Helps the WorldU become happy, U become a valuable asset to yourself and others. A HappyU will be inspired and motivated. A HappyU will love each day of summer fun that comes your way, whether you are taking care of your kids, finding romance with a new love, working with a community group to help others, or just drinking lemonade in the backyard. Is this exercise fun? You bet. As much fun as eating corn on the cob on a hot summer night, AND it works!


Toxic  People

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 Manipulative  These individuals are experts at manipulation tactics.  Is a matter of fact, you may not even realize you have been manipulated until it is too late.
 

These individuals figure out what your 'buttons' are, and push them to get what they want.

  • Why they are toxic: These people have a way of eating away at your belief system and self-esteem.  They find ways to make you do things that you don't necessarily want to do and before you know it, you lose your sense of identity, your personal priorities and your ability to see the reality of the situation.  The world all of a sudden becomes centered around their needs and their priorities.


Narcissistic  These people have an extreme sense of self-importance and believe that the world revolves around them.  They are often not as sly as the Manipulative Marys of the world, but instead, tend to be a bit overt about getting their needs met.  You often want to say to them "It isn't always about you."
  • Why they are toxic: They are solely focused on their needs, leaving your needs in the dust.  You are left disappointed and unfulfilled.  Further, they zap your energy by getting you to focus so much on them, that you have nothing left for yourself.
  Downers: These people can't appreciate the positive in life.  If you tell them that it is a beautiful day, they will tell you about the impending dreary forecast.  If you tell them you aced a mid-term, they'll tell you about how difficult the final is going to be.
  • Why they are toxic: They take the joy out of everything.  Your rosy outlook on life continues to get squashed with negativity.  Before you know it, their negativity consumes you and you start looking at things with gray colored glasses yourself.
  Judgmental  When you see things as cute and quirky, they see things as strange and unattractive.  If you find people's unique perspectives refreshing, they find them 'wrong'.  If you like someone's eclectic taste, they find it 'disturbing' or 'bad'.
  • Why they are toxic: Judgmental people are much like Debbie Downers.  In a world where freedom rings, judgment is sooo over.  If the world was a homogeneous place, life would be pretty boring.  Spending a lot of time with these types can inadvertently convert you into a judgmental person as well.
Dream Killing : Every time you have an idea, these people tell you why you can't do it.  As you achieve, they try to pull you down.  As you dream, they are the first to tell you it is impossible.
  • Why they are toxic: These people are stuck in what is instead of what could be.  Further, these individuals eat away at your self-esteem and your belief in yourself.  Progress and change can only occur from doing new things and innovating, dreaming the impossible and reaching for the stars.
  Insincere : You never quite feel that these people are being sincere.  You tell a funny story, they give you a polite laugh.  You feel depressed and sad and they give you a 'there, there' type response.  You tell them you are excited about something and you get a very ho-hum response.
  • Why they are toxic: People who aren't sincere or genuine build relationships on superficial criteria.  This breeds shallow, meaningless relationships.  When you are really in need of a friend, they won't be there.  When you really need constructive criticism, they would rather tell you that you are great the way you are.  When you need support, they would rather see you fail or make a fool of yourself.
Disrespectful : These people will say or do things at the most inappropriate times and in the most inappropriate ways.  In essence, they are more subtle, grown up bullies.  Maybe this person is a friend who you confided in and uses your secret against you.  Maybe it is a family member who puts their busy-body nose into your affairs when it is none of their business.  Or maybe, it is a colleague who says demeaning things to you.
  • Why they are toxic: These people have no sense of boundaries and don't respect your feelings or, for that matter, your privacy.  These people will cause you to feel frustrated and disrespected.
  Never Enough: You can never give enough to these people to make them happy.  They take you for granted and have unrealistic expectations of you.  They find ways to continually fault you and never take responsibility for anything themselves.
  • Why they are toxic: You will spend so much time trying to please them, that you will end up losing yourself in the process.  They will require all of your time and energy, leaving you worn out and your own needs sacrificed.
All of these personalities have several things in common.  1) the more these people get away with their behavior, the more they will continue.  2) Unfortunately, most of these people don't see that what they do is wrong and as a result, talking to them about it will fall on deaf ears, leaving you wondering if you are the crazy one.  3) Most of these people get worse with age, making their impact on you stronger with time. Frankly, life is too short to spend your time dealing with toxicity.  If you can, avoid spending mucho time with people who are indicative of these behaviors and you'll feel a lot happier. Have you encountered these personalities?  What have you done?  Any personalities you would add?